There can be difficult things to hear in “For Our Children,” but after people watch the film about a collective of mothers who have found strength in sharing the pain of losing their sons to police brutality, director Débora Souza Silva has found the theaters it’s played in to become a place of healing.
“I remember someone described our screening to me as being on Sunday church, because when people really connect with the story, it’s really beautiful,” said Souza Silva. “I don’t get tired of sitting down and watching the film again and again, and I do it because I just love to hear people’s response in real time.”
With the film now streaming on Netflix thanks to a release via ARRAY, it may be impossible for Souza Silva to see everyone’s reaction, but the director can rest assured that “For Our Children” is turning homes into places of catharsis around the world, just as Reverend Wanda Johnson has done for families who have suffered an incalculable loss. After the untimely passing of her son Oscar Grant, whose murder at the hands of police at an Oakland BART station was captured by bystanders and went viral, and subsequently recounted in Ryan Coogler’s debut feature “Fruitvale Station,” Rev. Johnson took it upon herself to do whatever was within her power to alleviate the pain that she experienced herself by starting the Oscar Grant Foundation to advocate for systemic change and connect with families in grief.
A major event for the organization is the Oscar Grant Legacy Weekend, in which mothers from across the country are brought together to share memories of their children and become a community for one another, and at Rev. Johnson’s invitation, SouzaSilva is allowed inside the inspirational gathering where one can see the mothers of the late Eric Garner and Sandra Bland supporting each other. “For Our Children” shows Rev. Johnson having the unfortunate responsibility of welcoming a new member to the group in Angela Williams, whose son Ulysses survived his encounter with police after being stopped on his walk home from a Christmas party, but became a shell of his former self after being beaten to within an inch of his life, drawing comparisons to Emmett Till when pictures were shared online.
Although the internet has been able to bring attention to police brutality in a way that is unparalleled in history, Souza Silva is able to show the importance of old-fashioned connectivity as Rev. Johnson gives Williams a call in Troy, Alabama and offers a compassionate ear when Williams has to set aside any pain she may have to seek justice for Ulysses as the police refuse to release body cam footage of the incident and she has to tend to her son who barely engages these days. What brings the two together may be tragic, but “For Our Children” is galvanizing as Rev. Johnson and Williams are moved to action by their children and one another, pulling through the unthinkable to imagine a more just and empathetic society, changing lives one at a time and rallying around legislation such as California’s AB-392 that reformed police procedures.
Recently, Souza Silva and Rev. Johnson were in Los Angeles for the film’s premiere and spoke about giving hope to audiences, why it’s important to show moments of self-care under trying circumstances and how even those who may think they’re not directly impacted by police brutality can help create a positive impact for those that have been.
From what I understand, this originated as a short, but soon developed into a feature. How did it evolve?
Debora Souza Silva: Coming to it, I didn’t know, and that’s the beauty of documentaries. You go where the story is. I’m originally from Brazil, and growing up in Brazil, I had seen police brutality as being one of our major issues and I remember upon my arrival in the U.S. in 2009, I moved to Oakland, and I realized this issue crossed borders and affects communities of color anywhere. I was deeply impacted by that. Fast forward, I was working at a newsroom as a video journalist, and I had the opportunity of doing a story on the aftermath of Oscar Grant’s case. I know that those stories go on the news headlines, and then we move on to the next thing and there is very little coverage about the daily struggles that families have to go through when they seek justice for their loved ones, but I wanted to investigate what those daily challenges are and understand what seeking justice means. It’s so hard to indict an officer or uncover body camera footage or to get a piece of legislation to be passed or created to protect the community, so I wanted to put a spotlight on those challenges and make them visible.
To do this story, I contacted Wanda Johnson, who I knew had the Oscar Grant Foundation, a center on preventing police violence and holding officers accountable, but the most important was offering a healing space for mothers and I asked if I could come and film her event, the Oscar Grant Legacy Weekend, which takes place every year. I remember [thinking] it was going to be really hard to be in that room with mothers who lost children, introducing themselves and talking about their children being killed. But what stayed with me when I finished that shoot was the resilience. I saw Reverend Wanda standing up in the room and saying, “If you don’t want your child’s name to be forgotten, you have to fight for your child. You are the voice of your child,” and just offering that space and encouragement to mothers, it was such a beautiful thing for me to witness.
I couldn’t believe I was the only journalist in the room, [and thought] “this is a very, very important story that needs to be told. And then I went on to publish the short film, but I kept going back and documenting Reverend Wanda’s journey, mentoring moms and offering them a blueprint for justice. That became the focus of the film.
Reverend Wanda, how did the Oscar Grant Legacy Weekend actually start as a way to connect with other families?
Rev. Wanda Johnson: After Oscar was killed, there were other people killed, but a lot of people don’t have names and faces in the media. And I had been meeting a lot of different mothers and just hearing their stories, just seeing their pain, and wondering how come Oscar’s name was in the media and their child wasn’t. Dealing with that really broke something in me to realize what could I do to help them to obtain the justice and peace that they’re looking for? So I began to form the Oscar Grant Legacy Weekend by having mothers come together. When I find out about [others who have lost children to violence], I call the families, I offer prayer and I offer words of encouragement. For example when I found out Eric Garner was killed, I called his mother and his wife and let them know that I’m supporting them, and it often starts out by them speaking about their child because so many times the media will demonize the children that when the community hears about it. They don’t even feel like that child is worthy of even being alive. So [I] really work with the mothers to let them know that they’re their child’s voice now, their child can’t say anything, but as the parent, you can share a part of your child that nobody knows — the good of your child — so others can get to know who that child is.
That’s so, so important to me as I work with the mothers to make sure that they’re sharing their child’s successes and accomplishments because we often hear a negative side instead of that positive side and we bring mothers from all over the country, encouraging them also to go back into their neighborhoods and begin to call on the mothers that have lost their loved ones in their area and encourage them and support them. Mothers are able to do that because we’re trying to connect [with one another] and [we’re trying to] have them be a part of this movement that we didn’t choose to be in.
Débora Souza Silva: When I watch the film [now] and those early scenes where Angela calls Wanda for advice — because there were no [support] groups in Alabama, and she just, she had to form her group from the ground up and she’s asking Wanda for advice, I could not ignore that in the film. In the beginning, I thought those stories [would] never interweave because whereas I met Reverend Wanda seven or eight years after her son was killed, I came to Alabama and I followed [Angela] from the very beginning of her seeking justice [when] what I really thought was interesting in Angela’s story is that her son survived a police attack and many times, those stories are not told. We only shine a light on case that [end in death], and we should keep shining a light on those, but I think we need to shine a light on this issue much earlier on before this happens. But mid-production I realized it’s not two stories going along side by side, but I started focusing on that mentee and mentor relationship that she was developing with Reverend Wanda Johnson from the very beginning.
Reverend Wanda, since I imagine everyone processes this experience different, how reflective generally was Angela’s evolution that you see on screen?
Rev. Wanda Johnson: I think each case is different. Families who lose their loved one, you go through this grieving process, so there’s some times where I have to wait longer before I contact a family member. Sometimes I’m able to contact them early, right when it happens and be with them right from the very beginning. With Angela, I knew a pastor there in Troy, Alabama, where she was at and it was my cousin who knew of the story, so he and I would talk all the time and that would help me to really get informed the different questions that I needed to form with Angela to try to help her become that voice for her son.
With other families, I find out where they’re at and what they’re looking for, particularly because for some, they don’t want to talk about it after it happens. They just want it to be quiet and leave it alone and there’s some who want the world to know what happened. So what we do is try to give them structure and guides on how to maybe even talk with the media and to deal with the crowd that’s there now and the crowd that won’t be — how to deal with the after effect when everybody’s gone. [Then] how do I deal with the court system? We try to share that information with them and not only share it, but to walk them through that process as well.
The film is particularly striking in being rooted in strength and empowerment. I was particularly moved by the unexpected scene of a spa day where as Reverend Wanda explains, “You feel good when you look good,” which must be a decision to include in a film dealing with so much tragedy. What was it like deciding a tone for this?
Rev. Wanda Johnson: That’s one of the things that we do for the Legacy Weekend. We want to shower those women that come and make sure that they can laugh, cry, and internally and externally examine themselves. We have our blueprint for justice, but part of that is “Hey, what are you eating today?” You might not be feeling good on the inside because of what’s going on, but we want to help you be beautiful on the outside, so we talk about the diets, the exercise and beautifying ourselves, and we have an attorney on site and the person who talks about the media, but we have the makeup artists, the exercise therapist and the mental health therapist on site [too] because we understand that they need different things at different times.
It’s important because you feel a particular way when you lose your child. There were days that I didn’t want to get out of bed. There are days that I would just go over to Nation’s and buy a cheesecake and get in my bed and try to eat the whole pie, right? So I know the very things that I was going through and some of the ways that I healed that I wanted to present to [others] to help them to get strengthened so they could continue to carry on in this journey without their loved one, still healing from the trauma that they faced. So we have that makeup artist making them up, the hairstylist doing their hair, just to help them to continue to cope with their life, even in the midst of them losing a loved one, or having their loved one beat up so bad that they no longer have that spirit, and will to continue to go on.
Débora Souza Silva: And Audre Lorde said that self-care is an act of resistance and you can see this so well in what Reverend Wanda said. I remember when we were working on rough cuts of the film, we had three or four work-in-progress community screenings, and [for] that scene of self-care we filmed Reverend Wanda doing with the moms, the majority of people would respond really well, but there was always someone who would question, “Oh, this is such a very sad issue. This feels like a lot.” But we need that [as an audience] and families need that moment of self-care. Joy is an act of resistance, so that’s a part of the fight for justice, having those joyful times.
Débora, was there anything that changed your idea of what this could be?
Débora Souza Silva: Obviously I started this film as a journalist, trying to shine a light on the challenge that families face, but I became a mom in mid-production and that really changed my way that I approached this story. The focus started being more on the resistance, but [as filming went on] I started to focus more the power of motherhood and [had the] understanding your child is the most important thing in your life. Now I understand why this movement exists and why Reverend Wanda fights so hard, not only for her child, but for other mothers, and Wanda has said this very nicely, but I think it’s important, not every mother is ready to fight. The message of this film is not like you have to go and be an activist. Some families just need to grieve, and I feel like her movement that she’s creating offers that space as well if you’re not ready for that.
Still, the film shows how powerful collective action can be and getting more people involved who aren’t directly affected by tragedy, but want to do something about it. What are the ways people can help?
Rev. Wanda Johnson: One of the ways to take action is when people in your area are champion bills, study the bill and if it is a bill of accountability, research it and then support it. Oftentimes we don’t support each other enough and because we don’t support each other enough, we don’t come up with the changes that we are looking for. So it’s going to require us to really begin to champion one another just by supporting the different legislative pieces and by supporting organizations who are doing the work. It takes funding to do that. It takes funding to implement the different programs. So a lot of bringing awareness to this film is going to be so key because it reminds America that this is still happening and we have an opportunity to change it from happening by the different pieces that we could take part of.
We understand everybody’s not going to be an activist. There’ll be some people who’ll be doing media like you. There’ll be some people who’ll be out there protesting. There’ll be some people who’ll be out there writing bills. There’ll be some people who’ll be out there supporting the families. It takes a whole group of different functions to come together to bring the whole together of having that total equality for all people, so I always say to people, you don’t have to be out there fighting. If you’re not ready to do that, don’t do that. Be sitting here silently, maybe saying a prayer, maybe writing a letter, maybe calling your local Congress and saying, “We need to do something about this particular situation.” But it’s going to require us to not walk around blind anymore, but to open our eyes and say just what you’re saying, what can we do? One, we can support legislative laws. Two, we can support local organizations. Three, we can support each other by ensuring that we continue to share this particular film within our country and outside of it.
“For Our Children” is now streaming on Netflix.